If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
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