im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
