Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize