Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
