yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
can u get pink eye on your cock?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
He's a Shit stain on my heart
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
