whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
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