I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
