i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
zippers are such a cool invention
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize