Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
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