It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
