Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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