sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
