i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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