DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Found your dick twin last night
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
