Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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