It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
