I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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