I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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