How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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