Whod you bang
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize