she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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