I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
