It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
