No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
