Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
