We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
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