Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
