I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
