I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
