Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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