I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
either way he was missing a nipple.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
MIDGETS
????
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
