Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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