Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
