Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
