I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Will exercising make me less horny?
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