If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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