Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
