So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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