in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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