Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize