And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
