I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
