so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize