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apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
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