i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
yeah, it was that bad.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me