he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
