Are we in a gay sports bar?
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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