I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
