I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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