My hand turned me down
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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