I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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