idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
