So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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